Jolyne's fever was yet to be confirmed cause by dengue. Thank goodness, her fever had subsided since Monday night. She seemed to be her old active self again. Dr. Low had advised to keep her activity low and have lots of rest, so we had to constantly remind her not to run/jump/yell, which, needless to say, was not easy for a 5-year-old kid. We also had to watch out for any signs of haemorrhage, which might happen for a severe type of dengue, and it would deteriorate the condition adversely - something I dared not think about further. As for the rashes, it had turned from red flat patches to rough pimply bumps which spread all over her body, with her legs and butt most severely affected.

I took leave to stay home with her yesterday. Although it didn't seem to bother her much, my heart ached to see my little girl all covered with the ugly rash. I really hated myself for being so helpless. What kind of mother am I for not being able to protect my little ones? I held her tight as often as I could throughout the day, and tears would start welling in my eyes, but yet I had to swallow it back so as not to frighten her. We spent most of the time engaging in quiet activities like reading, drawing, watching VCD, and playing tic-tac-toe. I could tell that she enjoyed very much being with me (and I being with her too). I realised that I had not spent enough time with her after Jayden's birth, and I should be ashamed of myself. I loved them both equally, no doubt about that, but at the same time, I should've known better than to neglect her, shouldn't I? I didn't intend it to be like that, I swear. I really am a bad time manager. I do not know how to divide my after-work time of 3 hours equally among KA, Jolyne, Jayden, and still leaving some for myself. I really do not know how.